“Dear Claudette”
Are you cat-weary? Determined to please your people? Having interpersonal problems at the dog park? Let Claudette’s years of wisdom and experience be your guide.
Q: Dear Claudette: How can I get my mom to stop dressing me in “outfits?” I am an 80 lb. boxer mix just trying to do my job by keeping the house safe from critters and whatnot. This is not possible if I am wearing a ridiculous shirt proclaiming that “bitches love me” or some other rot. I need help right away, as Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. Gerard, Austin, TX
A: Dear Gerard: I for one do not mind getting dolled up, but then again, I look smokin’ in just about anything I wear. But here’s what my friend Diablo, the bullmastiff mix does: he goes catatonic when his Mom outfits him in the latest costume. Limp as a dish rag. The photo ops are nil, and pretty soon Mom gets bored. If this doesn’t work for you, next time you take that big drink out of the toilet, dribble on the seat. Payback is a you-know-what!
A: Dear Gerard: I for one do not mind getting dolled up, but then again, I look smokin’ in just about anything I wear. But here’s what my friend Diablo, the bullmastiff mix does: he goes catatonic when his Mom outfits him in the latest costume. Limp as a dish rag. The photo ops are nil, and pretty soon Mom gets bored. If this doesn’t work for you, next time you take that big drink out of the toilet, dribble on the seat. Payback is a you-know-what!
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